The dangers of hand delivery
by Ms. KasPer
Summary: Trellis is trying to write a letter to Emily expressing his hidden feelings toward her. After a trial and error along with a few hit and runs and quitting at one point, he gets it right, with the letter that is. Now to deliver it. Simple, right? Oh my word will you be in for a treat. Not to spoil nobody but, dis gon' be good.
1. So it begins

Trellis reread his letter several times. It was a short two paragraph note that all but revealed his feeling for a certain red haired girl as was the intention.

It took him several drafts before he decided on it. His first attempt stopped at a full page and a half essay about how his feelings for her were strong and he wanted-

That's just it. He stopped right there. She would laugh right in his face. No way was this prince of the elves going to botch things up with a sappy love letter. He flushed that lump of nope and tried again.

The second one was shorter but no better. He just listed things he liked about her. "... I like your hair. I like your eyes. I like your mom. I like you..." The complete letter was 27 lines like that. It was a start. He decided it would be the one he'd give her.

Delivering it would be a task. He couldn't have one of the robots doing it. They had a mind of their own and a will to boot. They might mind Trellis's feelings toward their master and be willing to sabotage him. Stupid robots with common sense and free will. It felt weird to even breathe near her brother let alone trust him with this delicate bombshell.

Trellis mentally crossed him off his list of people to confide in and considered writing him up in his black list along with his dad, Max, the voice, Santa Claus (they had a falling out), Cogsley, a fish that had swam up his trousers when he was fourteen (out of all things to remember), and the person who gave him that scar. The fourth one and the seventh one may have been the same guy.

He never talked to either of the cat brothers so they weren't an option. The fox man wasn't eligible for this most prestigious of missions, thank you very much. He didn't relate to Vigo nor did he consider him. Karen? Ha! Luger would probably hang around Emily to read his little brother's coming out of the closet from the scrap of paper where he poured his heart out, more or less. So no. Besides, how embarrassing would it be to ask your brother to deliver your like letter?!

Be a man Trellis! Well, an elf man.

Nope, he had to get this done personally. How would Emily take it when he'd see her again? "So, you like me? And you could only tell me through a cheesy letter that you had someone else deliver? Wow, um, okay. Trellis I don't know how to say this. Would you like me to write you a letter with four word sentences then have my mom give it to you? Okay, but just to give you a heads up, it would read like this: Trellis I'm just twelve. Trellis you're nearly seventeen. Trellis we're at war. Don't be a pedophile. You're not a pedophile. I really hope not. Your brother would freak. I can't do it. It will not work. I'd say I'm sorry. But I'm not, sorry. We'll still be friends."

_Ha ha ha, that would destroy you! You fell hard for that girl. _

_"_Shut up, no I didn't. You are not allowed to speak!" It was that amulet of his giving him the business, again.

_Oh ho ho, aren't you bristly, master. Can't blame you completely, she's kind of hot._

"Wha- how dare you speak of her that way?! She's- she's-" Trellis spluttered miserably.

_Come now, I speak your mind. Deep down in your heart you know it to be true._

Trellis said nothing as his face turned tomato red and a similar scarlet creeped down his neck. He could feel the stone's glee. Little did it know that Trellis was actually on the brink of detonating his rage at it.

Not to spoil nobody but, dis gon' be good!

* * *

**You guys deserve another chapter on whatever story and the sooner the better. I nearly pity this chapter would have to come from me 'cause I've been on unofficial hiatus for months but, dayum, things have to change. -KasPer**


	2. And so it continues

**Guess who updated?! -KasPer**

* * *

A disturbance in the air is probably what it was. That must be it, what other reason could there be? There's no way in shmeck that it could possibly be the residual power waves of an awesome force from within a ship called the Luna Moth, high in the sky, riding the clouds. In no way could it have come from the frothy elvish rage of one *cough* smexy *cough* elf boy defending his lady-like from the technically pedophic remarks of one pervy amulet in his power, nope. And you were definitely not thinking that either, there's just no way on glob's green Earth that could be possible, unless it were a graphic novel or something.

Good thing this isn't Earth, it's Alledia, hello! Ah, yes, Alledia: a place where amulet entities very lewdly comment on their fellow amulet entities' keeper's physiques to their own keepers, *cough* hot *cough* elf princes show what they think of that, and everybody on a particular cat bro ship gets a six sense kind of willies because of it. By the way, that's kind of what happened.

* * *

_RRRMMBL._

"Woah, what was that?" Leon piped up, ears twitching cutely -wait no,_acutely. _Er, pick your poison. So Leon was reading 'Faux', a magazine he picked up a while ago that addressed a certain issue within the issue that he could benefit from, along with a certain bunny bot if things got out of hand, when his animal instincts told him something freaky was about to go down and, boom went the dynamite, something did.

"Hey Leon, " Emily opened the door, "You felt that too, right?"

"Yeah, what was that?" Leon replied. "Like an influx of frustration omitted through a tirade producing an angry outburst of stone energy." Leon did a double take, "Wow, I'm good." Then muttered to himself, "Where was this when I had to explain why I pounced on Miskit last week at dinner?"

"Hmm, I wonder who could that be... Trellis." Emily concluded dryly, rubbing her arms to get rid of the goosebumps. "Ugh, why is he so- hey what's this?" She picked up the mag Leon had left opened on the desk. " 'So You're Trying To Give Up Game Flesh: the guilty sweetmeat'. Wha-"

His eyes widened and he tried to snatch it back, "Oh, that's just- nothing, just something I used to- to-"

"Leon," she started understandingly, "It's okay it's really none of my business so you don't have to..."

"It isn't some weird problem I have or anything," he babbled quickly, "I- I'm not a suspicious person!"

"'Kay whatever," Emily replied in a low tone.

"It's just that I like to read these things because, well, because I'm a fox and I can." He stated.

"Are we not going to discuss that mysterious mini earthquake that happened right on the ship?" Emily tried to get back on track.

"It's not like I like it or anything, it's so stu- stupid," a blush grew beneath his fur, "And I certainly haven't started to develop these strange cravings for anything with long ears at all. I don't dream of the raw, white, gamely meat," his mouth starts to water.

She cringes with a bad taste in her mouth, "Um, awesome but-"

"You- you know what, let me tell you why I'm reading this invaluable article."

"Please don't."

"I'm doing it to protect the long-eared people. I'm learning the ways of the hunters to help them, I swear. Those cats, they might just-" He looks insane. " I don't know! But I'm definitely not doing it because I'm trying to give up the sweetmeat. And I don't mean anything immoral by it, either!" He finishes in a huff and successfully snatches the magazine, turning away and hugging it close to him.

"H'okay teach. I'm going to go check on Trellis." She said nonchalantly and started walking backwards to the door, "Oh, and by the way Leon," he turned back to her, hugging the article tighter, "Trellis and Luger probably wouldn't like you to call them 'the long-eared people' but I'm sure they appreciate you looking after their raw, white, gamely 'sweet meat'."

"Wha?" Leon narrowed his eyes at the girl who was slowly closing the door in front of her deliberately.

"Oh you know, because you couldn't possibly be talking about Miskit. He's a rabbit-like robot, not an actual, living rabbit." She laid it down on him before fully closing the door and leaving Leon with the new knowledge he somehow didn't figure out himself.

* * *

Trellis was just leaving his room and stepping onto the deck when the wind literally made him topple over. "Why didn't I wear my armor today?" He grumbled to himself as he stood up and dusted his new 'peasant clothes' Karen picked out for him. "Oh right, it got ruined."

"Trellis are you alright?" the wind blew a voice in his direction. It also stung his eyes and tried to use his eyelids and mouth as a sail when he looked up to see who was calling him.

Trellis shielded his eyes and pursed his lips against the strong winds to see who it was. It was Emily. "Oh crap, Emily!" He screamed in a high-pitched shrill and nearly fell over again. Luckily, Emily's pink stone tendril-ribbon-tentacle-arm thingies pulled him straight.

"Trellis are you okay?" She yelled to be heard above the wind.

"Huh? Um yeah, just testing gravity." He yelled back, the wind rushing in his mouth.

"What's that? I can't hear you!"

Apparently, the wind was blowing the sounds of his voice behind them both. Thank freckled Jesus she didn't hear his high pitched screaming then! Or anything else he could say for that matter. He immediately stuck both thumbs up in the air and gave her a cheesy smile.

Taking both weird actions into account, she thought to herself, "That's not very clear, " but chose not to say it out loud. "Um, well that's great but you should be getting back into your room. The winds are fierce and Enzo will probably want everyone to stay inside for a few hours." She turned and started walking away, "I need to go, I think I heard my mom scream, or maybe Rico saw a mouse again."

_Ooh, right in the masculinity._Came the sullen, teasing voice of his stone, probably to comment on his high-pitched screaming being confused for Karen's or a mouse-witnessing Rico.

Trellis's eyes widened behind his shielding arm when he realized no one else would be outside, the wind would drown out their words, and it was a perfect time as any to give her the poem. He quickly pulled it out and started unfolding it with both hands. Tears were being jerked out the corners of his wind-stung eyes but nonetheless he was happy for the opportunity. "Emily, Emily wait!" He yelled behind her retreating form.

_Gonna give her the letter and run off like you planned, master? _Came the sullen and sarcastic tone of his stone.

"You wanna second round?" he growled down at it.

_Oouhou, n~no, _it muttered all butt hurt.

"Good, now Em!" He waved the poem after her, "Emily wait. I- ah!" the wind ripped the piece of paper out of his hand and smack dab onto his face. The 'I like your mom' part covered his eyes and nearly made him do a double take, if he wasn't already pinwheeling his arms against the pressing wind. He looked hilarious.

Trellis regained his balance a third time and tore off the heinous article from his face. The elf prince held it out with two pinched fingers as if it were a pair of dirty a+f briefs instead of his shot at love. In their entirety, both articles would probably stink with the equally revealing quality of public indecency and bad taste. "I like your mom? What was I thinking?!" He gasped. "No, no no no no no, I can't- I can't show- just no!" He crumpled it into a ball and let the wind sweep it off behind him and hopefully it would land in a volcano. "Hrhrhr," he shuddered intensely and locked himself in his room.

* * *

Meanwhile, a wild Luger had been in the area and came behind the two young stone keeper's just as Emily was leaving. He came to check up on Trellis, who he was suspicious of having done something suspicious, and witnessed him do a weird version of the chicken dance before throwing a wad of paper behind himself and shuddering like the time a fish swam up his trousers when he was fourteen.

"Geez, what swam up his pants and bit down on a sensitive place?" Luger mused. The wad of paper bounced conveniently into his palm. "What's this?" Upon uncrumpling it and reading the smudged and curly handwriting that could belong to no other than Trellis, he gasped in disbelief, "Oh my glob! This can only mean one thing. Trellis is a womanizer!"

"What do I do? What do I do? Oh, what did that 'Sibling Parenting Because Your Own Parents Are Absent Bums' magazine say about this? It's in my room. Crap, Trellis is in there! Uh- uh, maybe the cat brothers would know. Rico must have had his hands full with Enzo, it's just logical." he ran away to the kitchen, where Rico belonged, and let his brotherly instincts escalate quickly. "Or maybe Karen might be helpful. She raised two kids, and that Emily looks like she would be such a flirt! She's probably in the kitchen, where she belongs. Damn, the one useful trait of mine he had to inherit and it had to be 'player'!" He kept on escalating quickly all the way to the kitchen, where he belonged.

Everyone belongs in the kitchen. There is food there. And apparently, there's gonna be some drama all up in here.

* * *

**It's funny enough, right? -KasPer**

**ParSio: Meh, but 'smexy' and 'hot'?**

**I don't really think either of those things when it comes to Trellis. -KasPer**

**ParSio: wow... you can hear the hundreds of fangirls gasping in disbelief and disagreement.**

**That I think so or- KasPer**

**ParSio: Probably that any fangirl thinks so. Btw isn't a sweetmeat a-**

**No! It's the literal definition. Not the other... you know. -KasPer**

**ParSio: I'll pretend I don't know. What are 'a+f briefs'?**

**Oh, the abercrombie and fitch underwear series. -KasPer**

**ParSio: You mean that douche brand? Makes sense. So what's with Luger and the 'belong in the kitchen' theme?**

**Luger is from a different time. -KasPer**

**ParSio: OK. So, disclaimer! Instead of telling you what we don't own, we'll tell you what we do.**

**It's a much shorter list in comparison. -KasPer**

**ParSio: and you better bet your sweetmeats that anything not mentioned is not ours.**

**Or ever was in any way, shape, form, or association. (ParS' may own a pair like those undies tho) -KasPer**

**ParSio: That's traitorous blasphemy. **

**You know, I don't think we own anything except the plot, this account, and your undies. -KasPer**

**ParSio: and your big mouth,**

**Don't you mean 'traitorous blasphemy'? -KasPer**

**ParSio: coated with sweetmeats and mediocrity. **

**Shove off! Please read and review. I'd love to know what you think! J^3 ^)/*smoochies* -KasPer**

**ParSio: Don't you mean JT₩T)/*nagging+complaining* on account of your new braces and real feelings?**

**Go rot your teeth on a sweetmeat you douche brand wearing hypocrite. I give up. j,~_~,) -KasPer**

**ParSio: I'm glad I can.**

**This is why I don't update much. -K**

**ParSio: I'm sorry folks, we seem to be having some self esteem issues, keep calm and review anyway. ;)**


	3. So now what

**This would probably be easiest to update and I've gotten the most motivating reviews for it so here you go. -KasPer**

* * *

Trellis sat around his desk, back to square one and pent up frustration. Unlike before, there was no crumpled up touchy-feely nonsense littering the floor around him. He was not slaving away with a pencil over cheap paper trying to find the right combination of words to express his fondness for a minor without coming off too creepy and sick. He was not grumbling and slurring incoherent lines and thoughts to put on paper or arguing dismissively against a voice in his head. He was just... sitting there... with a blank stare... carving into the wood... with his claws... he cuts in deep... and draws blood... in his words... of absent thought.

Okay, let's put a pin in this while we instead go explore a time where there was stationary shrapnel of clichéd love letters literally littering his floor, where he was agonizing over the perfect pick-up lines for the twelve-year-old in his life, and where he was struggling with the writing process while his no-good (secret) room-mate easily got into his head. Yeah, I'm just - I'm just gonna tell you 'bout that instead. J^uº)/ -KasPer

* * *

He crumples up another sheet of scratch paper and throws it over his shoulder - for the forty-seventh time that day.

"Gob, why is this so hard?" He whines gruffly.

_Why are you doing it at all, master?_A voice whispers tohim.

"I wasn't asking you!" Trellis replies haughtily. "Can't an elf just talk to himself without annoying interruptions?

The disembodied voice just laughs._Very well, master._

"Tch, it's not a crazy thing to do now and then," Trellis continues, unaware that the voice left, "What's crazy is talking with you because you're not even here. It's like I'm talking to someone made up," Trellis takes the lack of response as the sylph trying to scorn him, "but what's even crazier is talking to you when you don't even respond. If someone were to see me like this then they'd probably think I've lost it. Hey, talk back! You're always trying to start-up a conversation with me, well now's your chance you unholy pest. Speak Sylph! I know you're there you seedy little -"

"Trellis?" Luger opens the door a crack and addressed his younger brother. "Who are you talking to? Who else is in here?"

The elf in question quickly turns around in his chair. Luger hasn't faced him yet, the elder is still behind the ajar door. Now he's pushing it open. Trellis is screwed.

He's on the spot and not all too keen on explaining anything to the older elf man. Without thinking he spins the rest of his body behind the chair, climbs over it, and belly flops onto as much of the scraps of paper as he can, screaming, "Nothing! PTSD! Go away!" While sweeping more in with his arms and legs.

"Oh, you're trying to make a snow angel!" Luger croons, dismissing how otherwise unnerving that was. "That's very good but it's more like this,"

Luger proceeds to walk over to the pile, turn around, and let himself fall back into the litter and a disturbed Trellis.

"Woah!" Trellis barely manages to roll out of the way and watches helplessly as his elderly brother flails his limbs over the floor and then lays there splayed in the outline of a very striking snow angel. Luger wears a big, mellow grin and looks absolutely blissed-out. Trellis is not sure if he's more worried about his discarded land mines of shockingly revealing content or the shockingly revealing behavior of his usually mature brother.

"There," Luger stands carefully and looks back at his handy work, "that's how it's done," he says smugly, dusting off his hands in satisfaction. "So what is this anyway?" Luger asks nonchalantly and picks up a wadded scrap.

"Nothing, I just doodled over some maintenance manuals I found lying around," Trellis lied and traipsed over to the other, swatting away the scrap before Luger finished unfolding it.

"In that case you draw very curly cursive," Luger remarked coolly.

Trellis squints at his brother thinking, "Not sure if he knows I'm lying or he's just a dense old man."

Trellis puts his arm around his brother and leads him out of the room. "Brother, did you have anything funny to eat or drink earlier?"

"No, just the usual morning tea and muffins only there were no more tea leaves to brew," Luger elaborated, "so Vigo and I were at a bit of a loss but then we found some air sealed plastic baggies labeled '10g Cafnlp' of leaves and we brewed that up." The older elf was now gesticulating with his hands. "Let me tell you, my bro, there is nothing like a good cup of tea in the morning but a pot of that was something! Anyway, we kept on drinking well into noon and we made it again for the evening. Cup after cup it was the greatest thing ever. It made us very hungry though so Vigo and I went off to the kitchen but then I heard you talking to someone in your room so I decided to go check up on you instead. By the way who were you talking to?"

"That's not important now. Where are the rest of those bags?" Trellis interrogated.

"Hm? Oh at Vogo's - Vigo's Place! Y'know where he looks at books and stuff." Luger drawled.

"So the study." Trellis clarifies.

Luger clicks his tongue and winks while pointing at his brother. "You got it." Trellis frowns in distaste, which is lost on Luger.

"Here let me take you!" Luger takes Trellis's arm and leads him in circles.

"We're going in circles." Trellis deadpans seeing them pass their room a second time.

"Hm? Yeah I have no idea where I'm going." Luger admits.

"What?" Trellis stops them. "How did you and Vigo expect to find the kitchen if you don't even - Ugh!" He stomps away.

"Well I figured if we're going in circles then I'll recognize the door to the study eventually, right?" Luger calls back and starts after his retreating brother.

"Whatever I'm going back to my room!" The prince says dismissively.

"Ooh, I'll join you!" Luger proceeds to skip faster towards his brother. That's right, he's skipping.

Trellis turns back in a double take. Nevermind his current state of lacking sobriety, Luger cannot find out about those letters! "On second thought let's not. Let's go to the study after all."

So now they're at the study.

"So it's this thing?" Trellis scrutinizes nearly empty bags of dry and crushed leaf stuff. He sniffs it. "*wiff wiff* This is catnip." He looks at the labels and recognizes the poor spelling of the ship's captain. "Not just any random catnip this is the stuff Enzo puts in his pipe. Ungh, you've been drinking boiled cat drug water all this time, Luger. Luger?"

The elf in question was on the opposite side of the room, casually taking dainty sips from a tea cup.

"Luger no!" Trellis appears next to him and slaps the spiked brew from his brother's lips. It shatters dramatically. "That stuff's gonna mess you up!"

Luger bristles indignantly and scoffs, "I can stop whenever I want," he picks up another cup and holds it possessively, "I just don't want to."

Trellis growls and his stance says, "Not on my watch." Luger glares behind a swig of the lukewarm tea, "Come at me bro," says his eyes, "I dare you." You can almost hear fighting music in the background.

**CLASH! - CRASH! - BANG! - CLANG ! - CRASH! - SLAP! - BANG! - BONG! - BOOM!**

Trellis freezes, Luger holds in his tea. They look at each other.

"That came..?"

"From the kitchen."

They run out the room and to the kitchen. "Vigo!" They say in unison when they come upon the scene.

The baby wyvern whose name escapes me is flying in loops while a wild Vigo tries to knock him out of the air with a broom. Cogsley is yelling obscenities at the old man while chucking fruits at him. Miskit is hopping around the unhinged stonekeeper trying to calm him down without getting his head swept off by the swinging broom. Vigo is spinning around the kitchen, leaping off cabinets and dodging fruit while trying to hit Dagno like a piñata and playing wack-a-mole with Miskit. Most of them don't notice the prowling Leon pacing just outside the danger zone, always keeping his gaze on one delectable pink rabbot.

Vigo finally takes notice of the two elves and shouts out to them, "There are Dragons In The Kitchen!" before he's knocked out by a more brutal version of a pineapple.

So after that was all done and over with its safe to say the two elderly men will not be having any tea for some time and will have to wear patches to curve their craving. As for the illicit catnip, it disappeared and in its place was a story about the ventilation, heat, and two old geezers going senile. At least it took Luger's attention, and memory of it, away. Trellis didn't really care what happened as long as it never happened again and he was sure that Enzo wouldn't let it happen again.

* * *

Trellis was in his room again, at a loss. "I don't know what to do anymore," he sighed. "Why am I doing this at all? I should just try something else, something normal. I wonder if talking to her would work?"

_No! That's too mainstream and lame! _

"Oh great, it's you," Trellis grumbled.

_I'm sorry, I just couldn't help but see how you needed help. I could help you._

"I'm really not suppose to talk to you!" Trellis insisted.

_Oh come now._

"Say what you will, I'm not talking."

_Fine, all you have to do is listen, master._

Trellis said nothing and went back to his paper and pencil, waiting for a thought to pop up.

_Practice with little poems. Here's one: I love you. Would you love me? Let's get together and have a family with two twin boys and a girl of mixed breed. We'll seal it with a kiss and get married._

"Hm," Trellis cringed a little at the forwardness but wrote it down. "Ngh," he was about to say something but stopped, remembering that he wasn't talking. The Voice noticed he wasn't too crazy about it anyway and thought up another one.

_If you want something less childish then I propose something to this tune: As we are flying in the blue, I'm softly watching you. Oh boy, your eyes betray what burns inside you. After all I drifted to port, above the streams of ocean, whispers carried on the wind. As we are dancing in the blue, I am synchronised with you. But now the sound of love is out of tune. Whatever I feel for you, you only seem to care about you. Is there any chance you could see me too? 'Cause I love you. Is there anything I could do just to get some attention from you? In these days I've lost every trace of you. Where are you? _

Trellis had begun writing but couldn't follow to the end. The Voice sighed, realising that it went a bit over his head. He started getting bored.

_Okay that may have been a bit too advanced. You could use more work. Let's try another exercise and repeat after me. I want to hear your voice. No more of this silent treatment attitude. Now say this as you write it: Roses are red,_

"Roses are red," Trellis obediently recited.

_Violets are blue,_

"Violets are blue," Trellis actually felt like he was getting somewhere here.

_I want to put..._

"I want to put," he even stopped listening to the words altogether and just wrote.

_... a baby in you._

"- a baby in you. Wait a minute?" He was just now processing.

_PPFFFAHAhAhaHahamMAHAhahaHAhaheHEEhaheehAHAha!_

"Fuuuuuuuuuuu," Trellis realized he'd been taken for a sap and rage-quit the room.

* * *

Trellis sighed deeply. "She loves me. She loves me not. She loves me. She loves me not." He turned idly in a spinning chair, mumbling the phrases like a mantra. He had just taken a shower and wore a towel around his waist as he peeled away used pages of an extra notepad he was using to play "She loves me. She loves me not."

Little pages of woe-and-oh glided in space and slid across the floor after every which way he spun in the chair. It may seem like all he does is hide away in his room to do his thing, whatever it may be, but that was far from the truth. Between meals, self grooming, bathroom breaks, internal monologues at the helm of the ship, keeping up pretenses at training, writing notes he wouldn't send, and arguing with whomever rubbed him the wrong way, he had very little time to himself. Right now he only wanted to spin in that chair and strip away the pad until all that was left was the bindings. I can probably make up an interesting analogy between the paper peeling and Trellis's feelings but let's not. He was so relaxed I didn't want to bother him with brainwork. Oh right, I'm not suppose to reveal myself, that could break the fourth wall.

Suddenly a wild Cogsley appeared in the room with a basket of dirty laundry. "Hey, gimme your dirty clothes."

Trellis hadn't noticed him yet as he was still doing the thing. Cogsley would have snapped at him if only he wasn't so distracted by the thing the elf was doing. "- the hell?" He muttered. Normally he would leave the elves to themselves yet right now he was sickened but curious. "Hm, I am sickened but curious," and picked up one seemingly innocent, floored leaf of paper and read:

"Roses are red. Violets are blue." Finally Trellis noticed his least favorite bot reading an all too familiar line. He poked his head from behind the seat and peered at Cogsley with surprise and narrowing contempt.

"I want to put,"

Trellis whips around and lunges for the other but falls short with one foot asleep, still reaching out.

"A baby in you."

It's weird, to say the least. At first they just share space in near suspended animation, wondering what the other could have meant and what the other would now think. Little pages of scribbled-on white lay still around them. The more they stayed around like that the more it seemed like the pages were makeshift rose petals strewn around to set some mood. Before it got weirder Cogsley decided he was more sickened than curious and made the first move to exit with a "Nope," but no dirty laundry.

Trellis was left there like a forsakened someone left to clean up another's mess beside their own. As embarrassed as he was, it was exponentially more humiliating to clean it up. He cursed himself, the bot, and sylph for his current humiliation.

Karen came by looking for Cogsley and found Trellis crawling about on the floor. "Oh here's that laundry." He growled when she came near and picked up the basket. She would have minded but when she looked down at him she tried to not put him on the spot and added, "Um, Trellis, do you have any dirty laundry to give to me or, um, some clothes to wear because your towel is kind of, um, falling?"

Trellis wasn't really listening to what she was saying. He was too absorbed in his "humiliating task" and assumed she was mocking him about it. "Yeah, yeah, take a picture. It'll last longer," he said offhandedly.

Karen was taken aback. "Excuse me?! What is that suppose to mean Mr. Low Riding Towel?"

He finally looked up at her and down at himself before he finally saw what she meant. "Well shi -"

She thrust the turned out basket of laundry over his head and absconded.

A half-naked Trellis stayed kneeling after being poured with dirty laundry all over his lap, a sock and bra hanging on his head. He snatched the yet unidentified article of clothing from his wet head and clutched them both in a furious fist. "Lady if you weren't Bae's mother I swear I'd do something so sickeningly horri -"

"Trellis? What are you doing? Why are holding those unmentionable's like that?" A wild Luger appeared to catch him doing something weird and misunderstand.

Trellis realized in horror he was holding 'someone's dirty' unmentionables (like we couldn't have guessed *cough* Enzo's man-bra *cough). "Are you decent under there?" Oh right, his brother was still here.

"Is this a kink?" Luger finished asking a split second before Trellis could answer his previous question.

"Yes, of co - I mean no! Gob, no! I was just -" It made it all that much awkward. Trellis dropped the sock and bra in the pile like it was a dirty A+F brief and shoved the clothes off his lap. He stood up awkwardly and held his towel on as he took steps away from Luger and the pile.

"Jeez, you kids and your new..." Trellis rounded the dirty pile with a three-foot radius, tuning out Luger's unnecessary commentary. He wanted to make it to the bathroom with as little trauma. "Back in my day, all we did to have fun was go out and find the most - and I mean 'the most' -"

"SHUT UP YOU OLD PERV!" Trellis was sick of everyone, Luger, the Voice, Cogsley, even Karen.

"That escalated quickly." Luger said after, not at all affected. Trellis slapped his towel over his brother's oblivious face and trudged back into the bathroom with a solid slam. Luger didn't even flinch and followed the slam with, "So are you gonna finish in there?"

Trellis ran the shower head over him and murmured despairingly, "Just let me drown."

* * *

Now back to the not relatably far Trellis who is inefficiently etching words into wood with a bloodied claw. In his blunt carvings read:

The greatest thing you will ever learn is to love and be loved in return.

He looked over the line in steady study. It was the shriveled fruit of his efforts, like a jumped conclusion, proven to exist but unobtainable to him. He felt something for Emily, maybe it was just affection or some predisposed attraction, he didn't know, but as long as he was with her maybe he could learn. He wanted to but he was getting nowhere. As much as he believed in this greatest prize, it seemed he'd never know it and something that was never his could not be returned.

He scowled. In the way he was trying to go about things there was a huge wall in his path, writer's block. He'd thought of leaving the path all together but the inflexibility of it all absolutely Pissed Him Off.

He can't go back or go over it. He refuses to tunnel and sidestepping won't be possible. No, he's going to tear down the wall.

* * *

**ParSio: You know, it sounds like he...**

**Yes? -KasPer**

**ParSio: CAME IN LIKE A WRECKING BALL!**

**Omfg, shut up. That is so old. -KasPer**

**ParSio: Heh, either way you might go to hell for this.**

**Psh, I'll just turn up the rating. -KasPer**

**ParSio: ;P**

**A'ight, whatever but I do want to say that the Voice's second poem suggestion is from Woodkid's 'I love You'. I still feel like I'm missing something. -KasPer**

**ParSio: A few screws?**

** No! J -'n'-) Just a warning, a half-assed apology and a confession. First of all, the characters are ooc. I know that. For the sake of comic convenience I had the characters skewed. If it upsets you please tell me all about it. I revel in the discomfort I bring to you. Secondly, I'm sorry for whatever predisposed trouble I caused you. It was as personal and incidental as my liking for Tremily (which you'd think I love since all my stories seem to favor it. I honestly could care less, but I don't). Lastly, I lied. There is no confession. J0u*) Ciao mein amours. -KasPer**


End file.
